Who We Once Were
by thisgirlcalledD
Summary: Her target suddenly grasped her hand, bringing her out of her thoughts with a light kiss on the top of her hand. As Kallen stood, fighting a blush she would not allow to color her cheeks, he looked up at her with gentle eyes and a kind smile. "Kallen, is it not? A lovely name for a lovely young woman. I look forward to getting to know you in the future." Oneshot.


Disclaimer: I do not own Code Geass

* * *

Kallen cannot believe it.

She cannot believe she is _here_ at some stupid Britannian ball, surrounded by her father's peers. Nobles, international peacemakers, prime ministers, and a few – a very insignificant few – names of royalty make up the list of attendance to this party. As she takes in her surroundings, she can't help but stare at the extravagant yet elegant decorations that embellish the enormous ballroom. It is not her first time in a place such as this, and it is not for the first time she wonders why these people spend their money on all the wasted space. She could possibly understand if the space was being used for something purposeful, but no one is even _dancing_. Instead they all talk amongst themselves, gossiping (no doubt) like school girls on a field trip. It is pitiful, really, that they have nothing better to do other than talk about who else, amongst their ranks, has in some way shamed themselves and their family - though Kallen knows what these vultures are like. They watch you from the skies when you are left dead, far away but always able to help you should they choose; only they choose not to and when you die they feast on your remnants. They pick and chew at your remains until there is nothing left but the hollow reminder of who and what you once were. Kallen feels bile threatening to climb up her throat but quickly pushes it back down. She does not feel one shred of pity for these wretched Brits. _Not one_.

Many of her father's fellow noblemen come to greet them, and more than once Kallen is forced to endure the appreciative stare the men let roam over her body. Inside, she is boiling with anger. Finally, after one lecher's hand grazes her breasts "accidentally", Kallen cannot stand anymore and excuses herself. As she wanders through the halls aimlessly, she cannot help but tremble with well-concealed anger. Why must she be here? Right now she should be out with the rest of her resistance group, fighting against Britannia for all those who cannot.

…Fighting? Who is she kidding?

Though Ohgi often tries to veil her from the truth, Kallen is no fool. She has known that they have been fighting a fruitless battle for some time now. It is obvious. There is a shortage of weapons being given to them from their contacts, and their group is down to its last few members. Just recently, they spent what little money they had left to buy a costly Glascow off of the Black Market. She had protested immensely, stating they needed to save whatever funds they had left for future purposes, but Ohgi – and even Tamaki – has insisted. They had said that their future was slowly dimming, and that they rather spend the money on something that would give them a fighting chance against their Western foes. They then proceeded to give her the keys. Kallen knew that she was the best fighter amongst them, but to think that they trusted her with the symbol of their hope was enough to make her cry. Thinking back, that had been the first time she had cried in a long while. Ever since…

…Naota. Everything good in her life ended along with Naota.

Immediately a cold fury comes over her. She hates them. She hates these people, who wear fine silk of all different patterns and colors while her people fight over filthy rags. She hates these people, who turn away from luxuries like caviar and white wine and _filtered water_, for god sakes, with mild disgust while her people scavage the disease ridden streets for scraps of food like rats. If only she could do something. If only she could kill each and every one of these filthy, worthless, intolerable _monsters_ –

"Kallen."

Immediately a switch inside her flips. Her shoulders sag slightly, as if they are too heavy for her small frame to handle. Her eyelids droop. Her voice turns frail. "Yes, Dad?"

"Father." He half-heartedly corrects her. She nods her head as if she just remembers. It is a small thing he asks of her, but it also a small way in which she rebels against him and his Britannian origins. Besides, he's not home nearly enough as she'd like him to be and calling him Dad makes it seem as if they are just that bit closer, even if it is just for her comfort. "You remember our purpose here, correct?"

"Yes, Father." She affirms. The thought of it makes her want to throw up.

"Very well, then. Let's introduce ourselves." He holds out his elbow for her to take, which she does, and together they make their way to the center of the party, where a small yet tight mass of people have surrounded her target. His parents spot Kallen's father immediately and excuse themselves along with their son, guiding him towards her and her father almost hastily. The two families exchange pleasantries.

"It's a pleasure to have you and your daughter attend tonight's event, Sir Stadtfeld." The target's mother starts off. She is an attractive, if not generic Britannia woman, blonde and blue eyed and lithe.

"It is we who have the pleasure of attending such a grand event." Her father, ever the pleasant kiss-up, bowed his head as a show of gratitude.

"As humble as ever," Sir Weinburg chuckled. Standing over six feet with a superb build for a man of his age, as well as blonde and blue eyed like his wife, the two made an extremely aesthetically pleasing couple. "A quality nowadays rare." He turned his attention to Kallen, who curtsied in respect. "You're daughter, I presume? She is a vision."

Kallen gave a polite smile. "Many thanks. Your son is quite the looker himself. Obviously the outcome of such superior genes." Her father was saying. _You can say that again_, Kallen thought. The boy standing in front of her certainly _was_ handsome, with tousled blonde locks and brilliant blue eyes the same as his parents. Had she not asked around about him beforehand perhaps she would have found him especially attractive for a Britannian, though she had heard things about him which she did not favor, and Kallen was never one to value looks over personality.

At least, she thought she did.

Her target and the boy for whom this birthday party was being thrown suddenly grasped her hand, bringing her out of her thoughts with a light kiss on the top of her hand. As Kallen stood, fighting a blush she would not allow to color her cheeks, he looked up at her with gentle eyes and a kind smile. "Kallen, is it not? A lovely name for a lovely young woman. I look forward to getting to know you in the future." His voice was as smooth as butter.

If Kallen had been born a different girl, perhaps the girl she pretended to be, she was sure she could have passed out from the charming lad's antics. But she was not born that girl. She was Kallen Kōzuki, goddammit, and she would not go down without a fight. Recovering with impressive speed, she smiled warmly at him. "As do I. I look forward to our time together, Gino."

* * *

Their parents had excused themselves after that, probably talking about how well things would work out in the future. She could certainly here Gino's mother raving about how good they looked together. She still wondered if she had heard the woman question what color hair their children would have to her father.

_As if._ The only reason she had agreed to this ridiculous mission – _if it could be called that_ – was to throw her father off her trail. She was sure her step-mother had been mentioning things to him that had aroused his suspicions. She had no other choice but to comply.

"I've gotta say, you're pretty hot in person."

If only she'd had the guts to say no.

"Thank you." She said through clenched teeth, using every fiber of her being to come off as the sickly, sheltered daughter she pretended to be instead of the extremely pissed off person she was now.

"Don't mention it." He smiled, seemingly pleased that his crude compliment had contented her. "So, Miss Stadtfeld, what do you like to do for fun?"

Fun? "I'm very rarely _not_ sick, so I don't do much – much less have fun." She said, hoping the hurt tone in her voice would make him back off. Too bad it only furthered his resolve.

"You don't say! Well then, let's have some fun, shall we?" With no notice or warning, Kallen was suddenly in his arms.

"W-what do you think you're doing?!" Kallen screeched, more than a bit of her true self unintentionally coming out. She couldn't help it though. This boy was crazy, this boy was annoying, this boy was –

"I'm sweeping you off of your feet, of course."

Cheesy.

"You've _got_ to be kidding me." His smile only grew.

"Hold on tight."

His sudden movement as he ran nearly caused Kallen to fall, but she managed to grasp a braid – a braid? ("Ouch! Hey, no tugging back there!") – of his, and then latched on to his shoulders. She struggled not to call him every curse word that had crossed her path, but had managed to stay quiet during their ride. Once the turbulence had stopped, she opened her eyes. They were in a small scenic lake of some sort, patches of random flowers sprouting from the earth. Fireflies lit up in the air around them like stars.

It was beautiful.

"Wow…" Kallen gasped.

"My sentiments exactly."

"What is this place?"

"This?" Gino's gaze roamed the place before him. "What would you say if I told you it was our own little piece of heaven?"

"I'd say that was incredibly lame."

This earned a laugh from Gino, who put Kallen down as he did so. "You're not much of a romantic, are you?"

"You're not much of a realist, are you?"

They both shared a laugh.

"Ah," Gino sigh contentedly, moving to sit on the floor. Kallen gave him a look. "What? All that running made me tired. Besides, it's not like this is my only suit."

Kallen looked at her own dress. It was a beautiful shade of emerald green, strapless and stitched with intricate gold detailing that made her blue eyes pop and her fair skin glow. Her step-mother had grudgingly lent it to her after hearing about the opportunity Gino's celebration presented them. They had gone through a whole studio's worth of dresses before she decided that this one was the only one that, in her exact words, made Kallen look the least bit uglier than she already was. Kallen immediately sat down next to Gino, making sure to rub whatever was underneath her on the soft fabric while she sat.

"You look great in that dress by the way." Kallen turned to Gino, who was smiling pleasantly at her. "I was a bit surprised, though. How did you know my favorite color was green?"

She looked at the dress again, this time with distaste. "I didn't. And even if I had, I wouldn't have worn it just to please _you_."

Gino placed a hand on his chest and wore a hurtful expression. "What? And to think I got all dolled up to see you!"

"White isn't my favorite color."

"No, but I figured you'd like a sneak peak."

"Of what?"

"Our future."

She smacked his arm.

"Ow! That hurt! I thought you were sick."

"I am." She coughed sickly.

"That wasn't the strength of a sick person."

"What can I say? My strength comes and goes."

"Mhm…" Gino eyed her suspiciously. "Kallen, you're not hiding something from me are you?"

Her head whipped around faster than Kallen would have liked. "Whatever would give you that idea?"

"Call it instincts." He grinned mischievously.

And sharp instincts at that. "What about you? Aren't you keeping any secrets from me?"

The blonde's eyebrows rose. "Well of course I am. We just met after all."

Kallen's jaw would have slacked had she not been biting the inside of her cheek so hard.

"So you're allowed to have secrets and I'm not?" She huffed. How dare he! What a typical Britannian jack a –

"That's not what I meant." He said, giving her a thoughtful look. "I just meant that if we're going to make this work, we should be honest with each other. I'm not saying you have to tell me all your secrets or anything like that. I'd certainly like to know them, but I'd like to know _you_ more."

This time Kallen's jaw did go slack. She'd never anyone be so… considerate before. Especially not to her. Not since… "Naota." She whispered to herself.

"Pardon?"

Could she tell him about Naota? Probably not. Wait, what was she thinking? Of course not! She had just met Gino, and even though he was more of a gentleman than any boy she had ever encountered – save her brother – and he was still just a stranger. And a Britannian. Naota was _killed_ by Britannians.

_But still…_

"I just mentioned someone who was dear to me. He died on the battlefield."

"You don't say?" Gino asked. "What was he like?"

What was he like? "He was like the sun. Warm and blindingly bright, and not always _there_ but always watching over you, always supporting you. He was so passionate about what he did. What he died for. He was the center of the universe for us, you know?" When had it gone from her to us? "He always came up with plan when we needed it most. And even when we lost he said that it was our victory, because they didn't have what we had. We had _each other_. We were a family." The words flowed out of her mouth just as fast as the tears out of her eyes. She didn't know how to stop them. She didn't know if she wanted to. She _needed_ to get this out; she needed to _grieve_. "He was such a good person! He wanted to change the world. All he wanted was peace. Why can't anyone else see that that's what this world needs? I miss him so much, you know? It's not fair! Why was it him? Why did he have to get taken away? Why not one of them? Why not me-!"

"**Kallen.**"

And suddenly she was crying into Gino's suit jacket and he was hugging her like she was about to break and whispering comforting words into her ears because he knew what it was like to lose someone you loved and he knew that nothing made up for it, but he had to move on with his life and this house and his parents were suffocating him and he felt like he couldn't breathe half of the time and he just needed to get _out_ away from this life and –

"Kallen, I'm enlisting in the military."

It took a few minutes, but the sobs died down into measured breathes. Slowly, shakily, Kallen raised her head and puffy red eyes met baby blue orbs. "What…?"

"I'm leaving. In less than a month I'm going to run away and join the military." He couldn't look at her. Not when she was like this, not when he started to care about Kallen like _her_, "I can't handle living here anymore Kallen. It's suffocating me. I want to get away here. I want to go to the military and fight for my country."

He was expecting more tears, maybe a slap, maybe a shove. He was not, however, expecting laughter.

And she was laughing, alright. It started out as small giggles, which grew into chuckles, which grew into full blown laughter. Should she be laughing about this?

"Um, Kallen…?"

Her laughter died down as soon as he called her. As she looked at him now, he could not help but get the feeling that he was missing out on and inside joke. "Gino, you really have no idea how alike you and I really are."

What? "What?"

"I understand completely."

She did? "You do?"

"I do. So Gino, let's end this."

* * *

The two teenagers returned to the ballroom well after the party was over. As soon as they walked through the doors they were bombarded with questions.

"What took you so long?"

"What where you two doing?"

"Gino, I swear if it's what I think it is!"

The two teenagers calmly explained to their parents that after they had all separated the two had gone for a walk outside for some fresh and lost track of time after talking for so long. ("And no, Father, I was epitome and gentlemanly.") When asked about what the two talked about, they both said about their lives. Their dreams, their futures, their hopes; it was in one of these deep conversations that they decided that they would be better off as friends. They called the engagement off.

All havoc went loose.

In the following calamity that followed, as the two were being dragged away from each other, they both said goodbye.

"Goodbye, Gino." Kallen said, her smile warmer than the sun itself. "I hope you achieve your dreams. I know you can do it. Don't let me down."

"Back at you, Kallen." Gino smiled. "I hope you find happiness. And I especially hope you don't change."

"Took the words straight out of my mouth."

* * *

She cannot believe this.

She cannot believe that he's _here_, of all places.

She _especially_ can't believe he's a Knight of the Rounds.

_I guess he really did achieve his dreams._

She's trying not to stare at him from across the room, trying to pay attention to Lelouch's chess game because every time she looks at that traitor Suzaku, behind him she sees his tousled blond hair and those familiar blue eyes.

And then, as if to top it all off, he flirts with her.

"She's a lot prettier than her wanted poster. That's my kind of woman!"

_You've got to be kidding me._ Why does he have to make this so difficult? She turns her head away to avoid seeing the flirty grin that will no doubt be plastered all over his handsome – **stupid**, she meant stupid! – face. But really, pretending not to know her? That's just _cold_.

After all, they _were_ engaged…

Another lifetime ago.

_That's just it_, she realizes. That was two years ago. In the two years that they've been apart, they have moved on and grown to be bigger and do better things. He has grown to be Knight of Three, for god's sake.

And her? Well, she's grown to be the Ace Pilot of the Black Knights, a legend in her own right.

They have changed. They might as well be strangers now.

She raises her eyes again, berating herself for letting _him_ of all people intimidate her, and that's when she notices his cape.

His emerald-green-with-gold-detailing cape.

She struggles to hide the smirk that threatens to quirk her lips and so she replaces it with a frown.

Maybe they haven't changed at all.

* * *

R&R Please! Sorry for the sort of weak ending. It was 11:30 PM and I was getting sleepy but I didn't want this flickering flame to go out so I fanned the flame as fast as I could. Any way, if anyone has any questions, please feel free to PM and ask. Also, just to set the record straight, this is set when Kallen and Gino are 16. (Gino was 14 when his parents had that whole situation with the maid, and two years later he ran away, so this is just before then.) The ending is back when Gino first sees Kallen face to face and flirts with her (*fangirls*). You know, during that episode in R2. That one? Yeah, that one.


End file.
